


A VERY WATCH AND WARD CHRISTMAS

by MorphoFan



Category: The Venture Bros
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-26
Updated: 2016-12-26
Packaged: 2018-09-12 05:38:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9058030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MorphoFan/pseuds/MorphoFan
Summary: Written especially for The-White-Violin for the Tumblr Venture Bros. Secret Santa 2016 exchange.  The prompt was: Watch and Ward in cute Christmas sweaters, presented to them by Dr. Mrs. The Monarch.Watch and Ward attend the annual Christmas party for the Council of Thirteen at The Monarchs' home.





	

A VERY WATCH AND WARD CHRISTMAS

It was Christmas Eve, and the Council of Not-Quite-Thirteen was gathered at The Monarchs' place for the annual Christmas Party. The couple had volunteered to host the get-together this year, partly to celebrate Dr. Mrs. The Monarch's new position on the council, and partly to show off their newly-renovated mansion.

Wide Wale had sent his regrets, claiming that he had another engagement to attend. It wasn't that far-fetched, considering how busy the man was, not only with his legitimate business endeavors, but with his activities as a super-villain.

Monarch still felt it was probably because of him that Wale didn't want to attend. But since Wide Wale had sent a case of Dom Perignon along with his regrets, the sting of rejection was significantly reduced.

The guests had all arrived and the party was in full swing. There was a lovely fire crackling in the fireplace, and a beautifully-decorated fir tree sparkling in the corner. The stereo had an ongoing rotation of Christmas songs playing.

Dr. Z and his wife were dancing a West Coast Swing to 'Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree,' much to the enjoyment of the other guests.

"As you can see," Z announced in his usual clipped, accented voice, "Though we may be old, we can still cut a rug with the best of them!"

He dipped his wife, and she laughed delightedly as the other guests applauded.

**

Down the hall, Ward listened to the party longingly from doorway of the kitchen. 

It seemed to be the unspoken law of the Council that he and his partner, Watch, were on KP at this sort of get-together. He knew that it was his job, but it still made him feel left out, sometimes. It was especially hard to be alone at Christmas....

"The party seems to be going well," he mumbled, turned to Watch and folding his arms, "I wonder if they even noticed all the work we put into this shindig."

"Cheer up," Watch replied with a smile, "You and I are going out for beers at The Battleaxe afterward, my treat."

"Thanks, man," Ward said, with a sad smile, coming to join Watch at the table, "I guess I'm just feeling sorry for myself. We seem to get left out a lot."

"We're not on the Council, my friend," Watch pointed out, laying a comforting hand on his friend's back, "We're just the administrative staff."

"I know," replied Ward, as he went to work mixing up a batch of dip, "It's just hard to feel like you don't really belong around people you've known for years."

The two men worked in silence together in the kitchen, preparing food and beverages for their employers in the other room. The sounds of music and laughter floated in to them as they worked.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch came into the kitchen then, stunning in a short, form-fitting, glittering ruby-red cocktail dress. She walked over to the table, picked up a baby carrot from Ward's tray, and sampled the dip.

"This is excellent, Ward," she said with a beautiful smile, "You need to get me the recipe."

"Of course, ma'am, I'll email it to you."

She brushed her hand across the back of his head and he blushed, ducking his head shyly.

Next she crossed to Watch, who was ladling eggnog from a huge punch bowl into goblets on a tray.

"Almost done?" she asked, wrapping her arm across his shoulders. She picked up the ground nutmeg in her delicate fingers and dusted a little bit across the top of the creamy concoction in each goblet.

"Nearly ready, ma'am," Watch said quietly, "Sorry to take so long."

"Oh, sweetie," she said, squeezing his shoulders, "It's not that, it's just we're all waiting for you to join us."

Watch stopped what he was doing and looked over at Ward. The other man looked just as surprised as he.

"You... you want us to join the party, ma'am?" Ward asked uncertainly.

"Well, yeah," she said, laughing, "The Guild wouldn't exist without you guys! You're as important to this weird little family as anyone."

She turned and headed toward the door.

"Don't be too long, we're about to start the gift exchange," she called. Then she paused, leaning around the door jamb.

"Oh, and call me Sheila, will you? It's Christmas Eve, we're all the same rank, tonight." 

With another dazzling smile, she was gone.

The two men just stood there, not really sure how to react. At last, Watch picked up his tray of goblets, and Ward his platter of dip and veggies, and the two men followed Sheila into the living room.

"Here they are!" Monarch said, spreading his arms and smiling, looking like a six-foot-four-inch-tall elf with his dark green suit and deep red hair.

"Where have you guys been, we've been waiting for you!"

"The um... um... eggnog is ready," Watch said awkwardly, setting the tray of goblets down on the coffee table, "And there's plenty more in the kitchen."

A few of the guests chuckled at him, though not in a mean way, as they came to him and retrieved goblets from his tray.

Watch felt his face turn as red as his jacket, and he saw that Ward's face was a similar shade of crimson. The two men just stood there, so used to being outside the circle that they weren't sure how to include themselves.

Radical Left noticed, and moved over on the couch. He waved them over to sit with him.

"Have a seat, guys, join in the fun," his handsome, blond Right Side said, invitingly.

"Yeah, take part in the decadence of the Pagan Rite with the rest of us!" chimed in his terrifying Left Side with a growl.

And so the two friends sat there, making idle chat with the other guests, enjoying the food and drink that they'd provided. It didn't take long for them to relax and start to enjoy themselves.

"Well now that everyone is settled," Sheila said loudly, dramatically holding a hand to her ear, "I think I hear footsteps up on the roof!"

"What?" Monarch said, looking up at the pressed-tin ceiling, "What are you talking about?"

"Shush!" she ordered, waving at him. She looked toward the stairs, but nothing happened. She cleared her throat.

"I SAID," she announced more loudly, "I think I hear FOOTSTEPS up on the ROOF!"

"...Now?" called a voice from upstairs.

"YES, NOW!" she laughed.

"HO HO HO!" came a loud, cheerful voice, "Merry Christmas!"

Everyone turned to look as the Monarch's henchman, 21, came down the stairs, dressed rather unconvincingly as Santa. A ripple of laughter traveled through the group as the burly bodyguard entered the room with a huge sack on his shoulder.

He had the perfect Santa suit, complete with black, shiny boots and hat, but he'd forgone a beard of snowy white and instead wore his usual five-o'clock shadow and aviator goggles.

"Oh my God, it's Steampunk Santa!" Phage announced tipsily from his place by the hearth. 

Everyone in the room burst out laughing. Even the usually-stoic Phantom Limb couldn't hold back a genuine smile, though he tried to hide it behind his goblet of eggnog. 

"I don't get it," Dragoon said, looking confused.

"I'll explain it later, old friend," Red Mantle said, patting his friend's hand.

"You guys are just lucky that I couldn't find a Krampus costume," 21 announced with a good-natured smile, coming to the center of the room and setting down his sack.

"Most of you guys are definitely on the Naughty List, this year. I'm looking at YOU, Monarch!"

The Monarch was laughing so hard he was on the verge of falling over. He reached out and pulled Sheila to him, and kissed her, then tugged her behind the Christmas tree.

**

"How on EARTH did you get 21 to agree to THAT?" he murmured to her, nuzzling her tiny nose with his substantial one.

"I just whispered a sweet nothing in his ear," she replied with an impish grin, straightening the lapels of his dark green suit jacket.

"Ohh?" Monarch asked, raising an eyebrow, "And what sweet nothing was THAT, my little Vixen?"

She licked her dark, red lips seductively, and pulled him down so she could brush her lips against his ear.

"Mint-In-Box, Vintage AT-AT Walker," she breathed, and then kissed his earlobe, making him shiver.

The happy couple chuckled together, snuggling, hidden by the Christmas tree.

**

Meanwhile, Watch and Ward sat on the couch, enjoying the now-heavily-spiked eggnog. Nobody would fess up to adding the cognac, but Dr. Z had been seen tucking a flask into his jacket soon after he'd been to refill his goblet.

"OK, time for presents!" Sheila announced, emerging from behind the Christmas tree, discretely patting her hair back into place and smoothing her lip liner with a fingertip.

There was a brief chorus of half-hearted objections such as "Oh, you shouldn't have," and the like from the guests.

She moved to 21's side as he reached into his Santa bag. He handed her a gift, and she read the tag.

"This one's for Hamilton!" she announced, and she handed the small box across the coffee table to him.

"Well, thank you, my dear," Phantom Limb said in his British accent, "I don't know what to say."

"Open it!" she exclaimed.

He did so, and held up a small card, read it, and smiled broadly.

"A Wüsthof gift card," he said, shaking his head slightly, "Sheila, you are a diamond."

"Well, it was actually Monarch's idea," she said with a grin, gesturing to her husband, who smiled and waved to Phantom Limb.

"Good show, old man," Phantom Limb said warmly, raising his glass to his former rival.

"OK, next gift!" 21 called, reaching back into the bag.

Over the next several minutes, gifts were passed around to each of the guests. Each one was simple and not terribly expensive, but it was obvious that The Monarchs had put a great deal of consideration into their presents.

"OK, only two left," 21 announced. He pulled one box and then another the exact same size from his bag and handed them to Sheila.

"These are for Watch and Ward!" she said, with a smile. 

She brought the gifts to them personally, sitting between them on the couch.

"I'd like for you guys to open these together," she said, a hand on each of their shoulders.

"Why, what did you get us?" Watch asked her, holding the box up to his ear and shaking it as Ward did the same.

"Open them and see!" she said with an eager smile. She seemed more excited than they were.

Watch tore the paper off the box and slid the lid off. He pushed the white tissue paper aside, and lifted out a red sweater. As he held it up, everyone chuckled. 

At the other end of the couch, Ward opened his gift at the same time, and held up a green sweater, to more chuckles.

They were your typical 'tacky' Christmas sweaters, but along with the snowflakes, snowmen, and candy canes, the designs on the front contained other details.

Watch's sweater featured Daria Morgendorffer and Jane Lane wearing little Santa hats, and his named was emblazoned across the chest.

"How did you know I like Daria?" he asked, dumbfounded, running his fingers over the fine cashmere.

"Ward told me," Sheila replied, simply.

Ward's sweater featured a tall fellow dressed in a red jacket adorned with large yellow buttons and a long yellow scarf. He had a beak-like nose and reddish hair swept back from his face. Ward's sweater also had his name stitched into the design.

"Oh my gosh," the blond man breathed, "I can't... this is amazing... how did you know...?"

Sheila just pointed at Watch, who was grinning at Ward like a Cheshire Cat

"Who is that?" Monarch asked, looking more closely at the character on Ward's sweater.

"It's Jet Link," he replied, "From Cyborg 009... and he is AWESOME!"

"Love the nose," Monarch said, causing everyone to laugh, "Seriously, between the nose and the hair, I think we might be related or something."

"Good costume idea for you at next year's Halloween party," Phage piped up.

Monarch laughed and gave him a thumbs-up.

"Oh my gosh, these are hand-made!" Watch exclaimed, turning to stare at Sheila, "They must have been expensive...."

She waved a hand in a dismissive gesture.

"You earned it," she said simply, "And you also earned this."

She wrapped her arms around Watch's neck and kissed his cheek, leaving a big, red lipstick mark on his pale skin.

"Awwwww," everyone in the room cooed.

Watch turned absolutely purple.

"And you, too," Sheila added, turning to Ward and giving him a squeeze and a kiss as well.

The blond man suddenly got an intense case of the giggles and buried his face in his new sweater.

"Put them on!" Dr. Z called out, "Let's see how they look!"

With a shrug at each other, Watch and Ward each stripped off their bulky red Guild jackets, and pulled the sweaters over their heads.

"Very nice," Mrs. Z declared, "They look great on you."

"Thank you," Watch and Ward said in unison, and then laughed at themselves.

Monarch vanished into the kitchen for a few minutes, and then returned with a tray full of flutes of champagne. He began handing them out to his guests, then stood in the center of the room and raised his glass.

"I would like to make a toast," he began. He waited a moment for everyone to settle down before continuing.

"I know that some of us in this room have had our differences. And I know that the past year has been nothing if not challenging."

He paused as his wife came to stand at his side, wrapping her arm around his waist and smiling up at him.

"But we have persevered, and we have come together as allies to rise to those challenges."

"Hear hear," Phantom Limb said quietly.

"Many of us in this room wouldn't be here without Watch and Ward's heroism, including 21, myself and my wife."

Phage nodded silently in agreement.

Monarch paused to lean down and give Sheila a quick kiss, beaming at her as she reached up to stroke his cheek. 21 came to stand at his side, and Monarch draped an arm over his shoulders.

"You two guys have been the glue that has held the Guild together. And we all owe you a great debt of gratitude. So, please join me in raising your glasses... To Watch and Ward!"

"To Watch and Ward!" everyone echoed jubilantly, raising their glasses in unison, then clinking them with the people nearest to them.

"And Merry Christmas!" Monarch added, raising his glass again.

"Merry Christmas!" everyone shouted.

Watch and Ward turned to each other, and clinked their glasses together. 

"Dude, are you crying?" Watch asked softly, leaning closer to his younger partner.

"What do you want, it's my first toast," Ward replied, wiping his eyes and grinning.

"Merry Christmas, my friend," Watch said, smiling warmly.

"Merry Christmas, dude."

**

After awhile, the party began to wind down. 21 had long since retreated to his bedroom to change out of his Santa suit and the others had begun the tedious cleanup process that always followed a party.

The Monarchs escorted the last of their guests to the door as Watch collected the used goblets and plates on a tray and carried them to the kitchen. 

Ward came to join him, carrying the mostly-empty platter that had held the veggies and dip.

"Some party, eh?" the blond man asked, grinning widely as he set the platter down on the table. He hiccuped loudly, which made him giggle.

"Yep," Watch agreed, chuckling at his tipsy friend, "One of the best parties in recent memory, I'd have to say."

"Goodnight, guys!" they heard Monarch call out in the vestibule, followed by the sound of the front door closing.

Sheila and Monarch came into the kitchen, finishing up a kiss. Monarch moved to the sink and began filling it with hot water and soap to wash the dishes. 

"Just leave that, boys," Sheila said, taking a plate from Ward's hands and handing it to Monarch, "You guys have done enough work for one night."

"Are you sure, ma'am?" Watch asked, coming to stand before her, "It's really no trouble."

"Yeah," she said, "I'm sure. We'll take care of the rest."

21 came down the stairs in his shorts and t-shirt. He made a detour into the living room and then came into the kitchen with another tray full of dishes, and set them down on the table. 

Crossing to the sink, he took the dish scrubber from Monarch's hand and shooed the tall man away from the sink.

"Gimme that," 21 ordered, "Before you ruin your suit."

"Well if you insist," Monarch laughed, with an elegant little shrug as he backed away from the sink.

"Uh-uh-uh, not so fast, slim," 21 said, tossing him a towel, "You can dry."

The two men laughed and got work washing and drying the pile of party dishes.

Ward gave a huge yawn, teetering slightly, and Watch reached over to drape an arm over the smaller man's shoulders.

"I think it's time I get this guy home to bed," the older man said, with a smile, "Too much eggnog."

Ward giggled a little, his face flushed with happiness and alcohol as he leaned into Watch's hug.

"Are you OK to drive, sweetie?" Sheila asked, coming to take the older man's arm.

"Oh yeah," Watch assured her, "Totally fine."

"I'll walk you out," she said, taking Ward's arm with her other hand.

The trio made their way out through the vestibule to the front door, and Ward opened it.

"It's snowing!" he exclaimed in excitement.

"Hey guys," Sheila called back into the house, "Come see the snow!"

Monarch and 21 came running from the kitchen, and the group moved out to stand on the covered porch, watching the soft, feathery white flakes drift down from the sky.

"That's beautiful," Monarch said, pulling Sheila back against him as she shivered, wrapping his long arms around her.

"It's so quiet," Sheila murmured, snuggling back against her husband's warm body, "The snow dampens all the noise of the city."

21 stepped between Watch and Ward and draped an arm over their shoulders, giving them each a half-hug.

"Snow on Christmas Eve," the big man said quietly, "Makes me feel like a kid again."

"I was thinking the exact same thing," Watch concurred, nodding.

"Do you think we'll get enough to go sledding?" Ward asked eagerly.

"But then, some of us are STILL kids," Watch muttered, chuckling.

The group all stood together in silence, just watching the snow. Then, with perfect timing, the carillon bells of the cathedral down the street began to play 'Silent Night.'

"Merry Christmas, everybody," Sheila said.

 

THE END


End file.
